I need another slice – And these paper plates

pizza, products | March 25, 2013 | By

Paper plates that have triangles on it that say "If you can read this, you need another slice."

“If you can read this, you need another slice.”

I’m pretty sure I would be okay blaming the nation’s obesity problem on these plates just so I could have the conversation with my plate over and over again instead of inside my head:

Me: Hmm, I’ve already had 3 pieces of pizza….
Plate: Can you read this?
Me: Well yeah…
Plate: Then you need another piece.
Me: Oh, well that was easy then.

~ Two pieces later~

Me: Ugh, I’m so full…
Plate: Can you read this?
Me: Well yes, but I’m so—
Plate: You need another slice.
Me: But I’m —
Plate: No ‘buts’. You need another slice.
Me: Oh alright…

~ Two whole pizzas later~

Me: Seriously, no more, I’m so full!
Plate: Can you read this?
Me: I already know where this is going. Look at the empty boxes!
Plate: Look at me! Can you read this!?
Me: Of course, but —
Plate: *low, creepy voice from the horror movies* Order…more….pizza. You need another slice….
Me: ….
Plate: …..
Me:  Hello, Pizza Hut, are you hiring? I need another slice….
Plate: Atta girl…

How do I cut pizza? Lady and the Tramp slurp style

cartoons, humor, pizza, spaghetti | March 22, 2013 | By

How to cut pizza for small groups: Cut normal into triangle slices. How to cut pizza for parties: Cute them into small squares like a grid. How to cut pizza for just yourself: Cut it into a spiral so you can slurp it into your mouth all at once.

Well, Lady and the Tramp slurp style is what I’m going to compare it to anyway:

Lady and the Tramp slurping spaghetti and meatballs in a dog romantic movie.

Is it bad that I really, really want to cut a pizza like this now in order to eat it all myself? It would feel like the never-ending slice instead of having to continuously go back to the box.

Only 46 slices of pizza a year? (Wordless Wednesday)

Pizza Infographic
(A few weeks back, I got in trouble for posting words with my Wordless Wednesday post. Does it count if the image I post is filled with tons of words instead? :P)